What I Have Seen Prison Do To Humans

What I Have Seen Prison Do To Humans

In the past year, I have had several chance encounters with men and women over the years who have just got out of prison.
One of them is my cousin's husband she met and married while he was in prison. She spent her every weekend driving 100's of miles to visit him. She helped to obtain his release and he finally got out after some 15 years.
He had to do his halfway house thing and then he finally was able to live with her while on parole, Which ended according to him this past November.

In this time, he has had one job that I have been told. Allegedly they got a guy who owned a bunch of Travel Trailers and mobile homes in a park to hire him and let him work for the purchase of a Travel Trailer they were going to live in. This allegedly lasted about 7 months, he quit and for whatever crazy reason according to her and him they sold the travel trailer, Then began the begging for a place to live.
Allegedly again he has searched for and put out applications to hundreds of places being unable to obtain unemployment.
I can believe that part of it is probably true. The rest I am not so sure of now because of things I have seen and gone through with trying to reach out and help the two. That I will talk about later more.

I am 63 years old and have disabilities that made it impossible  for me to get hired anywhere anymore. Even Walmart wouldn't hire me for a lowly ass job in their assets protection department after having some 25 years experience both in investigations, security and loss prevention. During that time owning my own successful business for several of those years and when employed for others, I received the highest of recommendations and letters from the employers to prove the excellent job I performed for them.

Now take a person who has been locked away "into oblivion" for 15 years and they come out late in their lives much older and worn now, what kind of experience are they to provide an employer? What are they to do put on their application they have a criminal record and have been in prison for the last 15 years? I am sure that will place them on the top of the list to be hired or interviewed..
There are well too many candidates for  jobs these days.

This is an "employer's market" meaning jobs are few and far between and people wanting them are numerous. The employers opt for the best and pass on the least and those they  might have considered in the past before unemployment became so high.  This financial quandary we the people all are in is beneficial to the corporate elites as they now can choose to get the best and leave many others out in the cold. No work, means no income, Even for a person with disabilities and especially those with criminal records. Believe me they are at the very bottom of their list to even be interviewed for a job much less be given one.

Now consider this as well, While in prison these men and women have but one thing to do every day and that is to survive meaning they live in constant danger of losing their lives from either other prisoners, guards or even both. So they have formed their own culture and society while in there, Often through gang activity to find protection, often through exchange of sexual favors and yes contraband exchange and sales, Most often this contraband is brought in by the guards and those visiting girlfriends or boyfriends who are willing to smuggle stuff in for them.
I know the average person in America thinks it's all nice in there, Their not having to work, getting three meals a day, etc., They think they are catered to and deserve worse.. They are fucking wrong, There I said it.

Most have but perhaps a 10 X 10 room to share with another person that is a danger to them as well everyday. The cells are nothing more then dog cages in truth. Everything you do even bathroom use is out in the open. No privacy at all.
How do I know this? I served as a voluntary chaplain for a time on many occasions visiting our local State Penitentiary. On top of that I was a Criminal Justice major in college and have read many studies and read many books and seen for myself the state of affairs in our "punishment systems."   It's a nightmare of dehumanization of fellow humans no matter what they have done in the past.
All are treated like shit and you don't create or restore humanity by treating people like animals and telling them they are..   . "what a man thinks, he is" ( a quote from the christian holy book, the bible)

Now consider this, Most of their day is already planned out for them, They must eat at certain times, shower at certain times, etc. Work will only earn them perhaps a few brownie points or provide them what they are told a job for when they get out. Some even opt to take college classes while in there.But overall none of them are prepared for when they get out,  If one chose to stay in their cell all day instead of work or did a lousy job they "can't be evicted" that's for sure. They might find less preferential treatment but they will still have a roof over their head and food to eat. Medical care already sucks for these people it too could be made even worse. But the two things every person MUST HAVE food and shelter they will get regardless, and that's right to do.,  We all must have it to live..

Yet, their minds are still in survival mode when they get out and then put them out here where no food or shelter is provided unless they work and employers will not give them a job and you create an entire new problem for them that they are not prepared to handle except by returning to the old survival methods of "conning" people,
They WILL USE whatever lie they can come up with to just get by for a day to obtain food or shelter for themselves.  Many of them simply use their spouses as a free ticket to survive. The spouse who has no criminal record works and earns all the money, They spend it as well and sometimes worse then the person earning it.

Some manage to get lucky and find jobs and adjust but many do not. Some get jobs and yet that old prison survival mechanism is all their brains understand.  They also think freedom meant they would be free from being told what to do, when to do it. and they sure don't like the feeling of not being free to move about or having to stay in one place for very long, etc.  Instead they come out in to the "real world" and find slavery is still well and alive and at work out here as well,  Here in the "real world," one must work, one must make money, one must to be considered even worthy or thought of to have value in life.
If not, you are an outcast.  I know that as one who has not been able to work for a few years now because of my disabilities (which people can't see but they are very real). I am blessed because I was able to work from the time I was 9 years old until I was about 59.  I paid into the "national require you pay" Social Security system since I was 14 years old,  so I live on that alone.

If you can't work or people won't give you a job, your suffering "out here" could become as great as in there or worse. No job, no food or shelter unless you can find someone that will reach out to you and offer the help. I did reach out and have in the past with what little I have had to do so with. For a few it worked, for a few it didn't.  I found you can't bat 100 percent in the real world with everyone.

I believe in second chances and third and more but in that even as I have found in my life, each mistake is an experience to learn from and improve on in avoiding doing the same thing over and over again. Eventually you have to wake up, mature and move on and try to be as independent as you possibly can and quit doing the same shit over and over again.
. Truth is and that includes me in this real world we live in, people do not and find themselves loving entirely unconditionally as I believe we are loved, if there is a god, as described by most theist as a supreme being, reigning or creating all the rest of us. To me that kind of love does and would only separate us from this being, making it truly "Supreme,"
Otherwise if this being loves as we do with all kinds of conditions, many for which we are afraid to admit we do have in relation to others around us, Then if there is a hell then every single one of us is headed there for it, no exceptions.. Perfection is what would be called for to avoid it and I have not met even in myself yet a single perfect human being alive on this planet, not once if based on ethics, morality, or even love, PERFECT...... WE ALL FAIL THE TEST!!

So for my own self discovery, all other versions of god are merely "anthropomorphic" projections of ourselves, with our judgments, our conditional love, our love for vengeance, our love for hate, resulted and results more in a god created in our image!!  I personally have come to not believe in such a god. I do believe in infinite, divine, pure, absolute love though.. That I truly do, because I know I must be loved that way or what is the use of carrying on in this life with all the mistakes I have made in my past and all the wrong I have done others to end up in the end being only sent to a place of torture " infinitely" for my "finite" mistakes and lack of perfection as a human where perfection of morality and ethics is demanded by a god OR else!!
No! I can't buy into that kind of Supreme being, a god,  because for me they wouldn't be supreme at all for they would love no better then I have in my lifetime. I still don't love "supremely," I love the best I can and do.  Will I ever love entirely unconditionally, I continue to hope so, and continue to look in the things I encounter in life to ask myself the question, did you love unconditionally? In my honesty at times, I have to say, no, I didn't. BUT....
 I do so without shame, guilt or fear about it, because I know that which I am loved is so opposite of what my own love has been that alone removes all fear.
That there has made the entire difference in my life and enabled me to love again and to even fail at it.  To fail without fear and to succeed without desire for reward.
 It has enabled me to love greater then before, maybe not perfectly- unconditionally yet, but I find I am getting there everyday a little more.
I find I am willing to at least take chances on others who have a clear history of abusing my trust or that of others. For I was given that chance but EVEN MORE.. .....

Now, the rub!  This person I was helping, has continued to abuse my trust and not only that when on about the fourth time of doing so, I refused to take their phone calls recently because I am tired of being lied to and having my trust abused, they decide because I wouldn't jump to their beckoned call this time and call them back, to tell me, to "kiss their ass."  

All I did this time was do the same they did to me  when they violated my trust in lending them my car for two days and they had it for 5 days instead and the car wasn't even where it was suppose to be., They refused to answer my phone calls.
 It took a lot of stressed actions on my part to finally get my car back to me. I get it returned, on the condition of course I had to drive them back to where they were now living which was nowhere even close to where they said they did.
The car is returned with a broken window and now the door has to be replaced because it would cost more trying to get it repaired then buying a mismatched colored door from a junk yard. I am still looking at a couple hundred dollars for the repair.  I have also been stuck with a $100 electric bill for the little time they stayed in my travel trailer here on the land where I live, that I gave them to live in free of rent or charge, It wasn't good enough for them and they made that clear. They would go off and leave lights on, etc and I warned them that our electric charges out here are high!! Well, they didn't care, because it's apparent to me now, they had no intention of paying the electric bill.
He was even suppose to have come by the day they moved out and dig a hole for me to dump the sewage in the tank, no show of course.
On top of this all now, I learn they owe my wife two hundred dollars they borrowed six months ago, and told her they would pay back in a week and never did. They told her they were about to lose their car if they didn't make a payment.  Then the next time they show up here they have a different car.

My cousin and I grew up together on and off , she rarely had much to do with me at all in our latter years, until she found that now that she had married this guy and he was out, that her own family refused to help them out and she had heard and seen me not make a judgment about him or her at all. She "presumed" upon my love that I was the one to turn to since that was so, and yes I reached out to much my chagrin now.

She never contacted me by phone or came out here to visit or came by my home the entire time I and my first wife lived in Tyler years ago when her and first husband whom she divorced later were both living there.  Her daughter did a few times, but now she uses her to make contact with me and get me to do favors for them.  The only way I got through to them about the car while they refused to take my phone calls was to call her up and have her relay the message, get it done or it won't be good for them. That was my last choice to have to turn to and I didn't want to have to do that, but they refused to return my phone calls!!

Anyway, what I see, and yes this is my judgment not one to condemn but to correct someone.

He has to have a change of mind and how this real world operates and do all he can to do for what has to be done now to get work and take what is given and be thankful for it. I have had to polish floors and clean up shit in a nursing home for a time to get by and more over the years!!. I did that nursing home job for a time, was thankful to have it,  but eventually was laid off after a year from that job and finally obtained a better one.

They need to learn the next time someone offers help, don't abuse their trust, listen to some wisdom they might provide not as a condition of their help but as a means to help them learn and adjust into this real world of ours. Breakout of the survival mode of thinking, I wasn't here to harm either one of them but to help them start a good life all over again. That was refused and instead all I got was abuse of my trust instead.What I apparently offered was not good enough for either one of them. I know my cousin and she has always had the best in life and only in the last few years has she been encountering having to live with less and she is not happy about it at all. She never knew what it was like to grow up like I did nor to go through the shit I have, being homeless, really homeless twice. They haven't been homeless yet, because they have obtained help time after time, I got none in my times of despair it was all up to me and my wife..  My cousin never reached out to help me, her parents did once or twice though but her or her brother and sister could have cared less about the shit I was going through!!
 Instead I know for a fact all they had was judgment for me period and avoided me like the plague.

 I HAD to pull myself up by my own boot straps when my health was still good and did so many a time. It was hard, tough and at times seemed impossible but "all things are possible to him or her that believes," I learned that for sure..

While here and the times of visits before there was no attempt on either one of their parts to try to build a relationship with me, rather it was all about what they could get out of me or my wife, free gratis.  That hurts, yes it does, especially when it became a persistent practice of theirs along with the abuse of trust.  I am done with them, I told their daughter I was done being screwed and I am.

Is that unconditional love? Maybe it's not, thus I know there must be that kind of love existent somewhere, because WE ALL NEED IT from time to time, but we also need to grow up, mature, and become not just loving human beings, but human beings without crutches that aren't necessary a lot of the time.  We definitely create much of our own world that we live in, not all of it, but a large portion of it.. We create a heaven or hell here in the present now.  There are circumstances, and events that we had nothing to do with and there are mistakes made by every human being on this planet everyday, Horrible mistakes but none of us are not redeemable, none of us are without value or worth. My cousin is not, her husband is not without value or worth, They need only to learn from their own mistakes and quit lying and abusing trust and thinking they need to in order to get by in this world and to learn to be thankful for any hand that reaches out to help and not to take advantage but to learn to give back some,
Pay it forward if not to the people that helped you but at least to someone else in return and you can't do that, if you continue to keep yourself in the present state you find yourself in. One needs to learn if you keep doing the same thing over and over again and isn't working, it's time to do something entirely different then you have in the past. Time to move on from a "prison taught survival mode" of thinking in this world, Quit being a slave, but also find out the truth the way this world works AND it does work by slavery to the dollar, so you are going to need all that you can get, to get by in this "fucked up" world.  AND you can't obtain it doing the same shit those in power do to us, "abuse trust" and "use people" for only their benefit.
Yes, folks prison teaches that. It is not a place of restoration or rehabilitation but a place the insanity of this world can be forced into the mind of a human.. I hate our American justice system, it's the American INJUSTICE system, the punishment system, It prepares people to go out of there and find even more punishment in their lives and yet teaches them not a thing about how to escape it and find life. True life.

 My advice, find a new way, create one, make something else work if you can. The old doesn't work it never has. Those old methods of using and abusing others to get what you want, only leave a trail of tears behind and a lot of hurt of others and ultimately yourself.

I think one of the great puzzles in this life is to find the ways we can live life without resorting to all the bull shit and that is tough.  It is there in living my life, thinking, asking questions and even testing things,  I find little things here and little things there and the puzzle is becoming a better picture for my life. I find ways to do things differently then the way I have done them in the past. To be creative, to be innovative and to love the best I can.
Love is not a law, it is something only that we can learn to do through trial and error. Even though all the power and capability to love unconditionally is within us, we still live in a very "fucked up" world, no doubt and we will struggle at times, to love as this DIVINE LOVE DOES US, this I know.. but that's what makes this DIVINE LOVE nothing to fear but to embrace and be thankful for..

Pay it forward where you can, and where and when you can't, no fear, just move on and try again.  You will find there are times, the minds and actions of others make it near impossible for us to do so...  but if Divine Love has not given up on us, then don't give up on LOVE..  it will and does change us, a teenie -tiny bit at a time.. but it's better then the option out there we see and so often feel.

WE suffer not because of some god putting shit on us, we suffer because that is just part of the process of coming to understand of what Divine Love is and how we are being transformed, changed, and made brighter lights everyday.  WE suffer most often because we have yet learned  how to be really human, but we also suffer because the world we live in there are people who run this shit that make us all suffer and none is without doing so to vast number of human souls across this planet.. Welcome to the "REAL WORLD."

I may never have been sent to their fucking prisons, and never would want to be, but life itself can be a prison if we aren't careful where it is taking us and where it has at times.. Think before you act and always be willing to give mercy where it's asked for or needs to be. Compassion I know is always in our hearts.. if we but listen.

I gave mercy because of my compassion to my cousin and her husband, I could have called the cops when they were refusing to return my phone calls and had not returned the car when they were suppose to, but I didn't, and I never would have actually because I know the systems idea of justice is bull shit. and I have one that is better then what they have ever perceived.

How do I give mercy to someone who calls me up  and leaves a voice mail and says, "I don't know why (come on now) you won't return our calls." Then goes onto say, "if it's about the car," then KISS MY ASS!"
 It isn't about the car, (which you answered your own stupid statement in your question, out of a feeling of guilt about that incident)   IT's about you refusing the help offered and then it turns out you have been the entire time, abusing the trust of those that love you and have helped out,  because your actions and those words you stated, say that is true.
Did you ever once step forward like a man and say, "hey I/we screwed up and am really sorry for what I/we did?"
 Did you once as a man say, "hey, I appreciate the help, and will do all in my power to see we get your money to you and pay the electric bill."  
"Did you once approach my wife and say " hey, I am sorry we haven't got you paid back and didn't meet that week our obligation I said we would?"  You know what, that simple act would have been a act of showing me, you at least "feel" our love, but you didn't, you expected something, that no one -HAD to give - they gave it out of love for you both and you SHIT ON IT..  

"You BOTH burned a bridge before it was ever built"

What does prison do for humans? Not a DAMN THING.. it dehumanizes them worse and turns them into much like the psychopaths that created these and the system and run the damn things.
I know that, I know it's not his fault in what he was left with when he got out. My message to him is this.... Now it's time, to reject all that bull shit, and begin to seek how you can escape all that bull shit and make a life for you and my cousin of at least having food and shelter. and warmth  and do it without letting the system be able to come in and violate your peace and put you away into that shit again..

Did my cousin, she do any of things I described above as to coming to me as he should have...., Nope, why not?  She's a prisoner of her upbringing that the world owes her the best and she best have it or she will not be happy at all. For that I feel sorry for her husband. He would have been better off to have come out of prison alone. For now she is just going to have to be happy with the $1600.00 per month she earns at her management job, which by the way is well over $500., more then I bring in each month. She is going to have to learn to budget and live on less and be happy about it.
That means dear cousin, you aren't going to have what you had while growing up, the best, in your mind of everything, rather you are going to have to be thankful for the little things in life even an old run down travel trailer to live in. The most important thing I am thankful for everyday is my shelter, my food and a warm place to live and one person who has seen that I have a place to live, my wife.

I too in the past have abused her trust in ways, and she has mine as well.  I have asked her forgiveness for that and changed my life once I saw my mistakes and ignorance as well. Now as to her giving me what I want, she may never be able to again, and I don't hold that against her, rather I still sing a song now of thanks, rather then judgment on her anymore.   That has only happened in my mind and heart here in the last few weeks more then ever before to release her even more and it has released me as well.   I began over a year ago to give her the peace she deserved and wanted, That's a start. Anything is a start from doing the same shit over and over again..My advice to people just coming out of their HELL HOLE prisons, try something different. It is good to look to closely and see what they did to you but don't go into a self-pity mode, seek to change it all for YOUR LIFE..for your sake, to prove them all wrong, if nothing else.  Love thyself first but remember true love of one's self does go out to others as well

The changes I made have been good for her and as well as I. Though most people judging it, think they know our shit but they don't, So what works. works best when people aren't harming one another, whatever that OPTION may be.. non-conformity  is just fine with us both.  We don't have to keep choosing the solutions that culture, religion and society say is all there are is...

Divorce isn't always the answer to everything, that's just the way this world thinks and it's bull shit as well.   There are always options and some not so status quo..  people most of the time won't take them they are afraid of what others will say  or think, They are afraid of not going along with the crowd. Even religion has driven divorce over a whole lot of other choices that could have been made.

Just as divorce is not the only option for problems in a marriage for individuals,  nor is the criminal justice system of America the only option available to us as culture or society to solve those problems we have judged a crime. .
We have tried it, the American "injustice system"  it doesn't work and my experiences with those coming out of it, proves that even more.  It's time for the country that practices the "system of punishment" greater then any other nation in the world, to give it up and try something new. How about it folks?..
 Prison dehumanizes and programs people to be in a "survival mode" and to find satisfaction to stop  their fears in any way they can even through the abuse of others if necessarey.
The guards do it in there and so don't the prisoners.. ..   It's a total failure.  face it and wake up!!
It's a psychopathic system that benefits no one at all. It DOES NOT BENEFIT SOCIETY, you have been lied to and told that it does. ..

That's what prison does to humans, it dehumanizes them....   and it's not even near approaching even trying to love.. and do no harm..   So how is it Christians are the worse at calling for it?  They have created a god in their own image.  that's how!    (sick) ...  and often people who come out that act just like their selfish, demanding tyrannical rulers and gate keepers, with a mind for thinking, I am going to get all I can and  take it from others even if it's their own blood or that of someone else's to accomplish my self needs. .. UGH :(

Stop, think and reason, don't let your emotions rule your brain. Use your heart and brain together and save the emotions for the one's that will do you good, not for the one's right now that you feel in your situation. Those emotions are those that will harm you and others.. Look at your situation and circumstances not as a handicap but as a stepping stone to something better and then go for it, with all you have within you..  to get it done.   My advice to everyone..   including myself all the time.

The Church Militant and Triumphant

I am borrowing and editing from something I read only because I appreciated the context and in the way it was written, that so agreed with my own research and study of especially the last ten years.

Tragically, the history of the church has been largely a history of people that say, " I believe in  " Jesus BUT have refused to trust the WAY of the crucified Nazarene and instead given in to the very temptation he resisted. It's the history of an "Institution" that has frequently traded it's entire mission to bring Good News to the world and peace.
It is the history of an "organization" that has more then frequently forsaken the slow, discrete, non violent, non retributive, peaceful way of transforming the world for the immediate, obvious, practical, and less costly way of improving the world and least that is what they thought they would do.
It is a history of a people who too often identified the "Kingdom of God Within You", with a "Christian version of  - the kingdom of the world.

For the first 300 years, this wasn't so. Followers of  "The Way" of Jesus, during that time period saw themselves as resident "aliens."  They were a persecuted minority and as such did not dream of corporately exercising "power over others."  Indeed those few followers of the Way, resulted in a huge increase and grew at a mind boggling rate!! This growth came about not by "Christians" fighting for their rights, as many do today, but largely by seriously being opposed to archy and the archy's of this world and it resulted in them being put to death by the State. No different then like the One  they said they followed in his way of love and peace.
It was during this time that the word, "martyr", which originally meant "witness" came to mean "One who dies for their faith," for dying was one the primary ways these followers were hushed and silenced by the Arky, "The State" for being witnesses of their faith.
In fact many considered it an honor to be murdered as witnesses of the Kingdom they considered themselves citizens of,  one, unlike any kingdom of this world.

I am not suggesting that the early followers, all of them were a perfect expression of the Kingdom of Divine Love (God), they had their human weaknesses as well, from time to time, as we all do.  They too also begin to absorb some other religious ideologies as well. What we could call "pagan" ideas and attitudes. Pagan meaning some of those ideologies already that existed in many other religions, that too were based on arky's (rulers) as well.
But to a large degree the early followers of the Way, looked like a corporate bodily version of the One they called Jesus the Christ. They were willing to lay down their own lives if necessary to protect the lives of others, suffering injustices and hate by the arky's of the day. Being especially Rome at the time..  The main proof  they offered the world, was not a Jesus of the past in Jerusalem but the living Christ in them, as the Christ themselves.. both individually and corporately when they came together.

It's difficult to overemphasize the change that occurred when in AD 312, the emperor Constantine claimed conversion. Just prior to an important battle of empire war, legend has it, that Constantine had a vision in which he was told to paint Chi Rho (the first two letter of the Greek word for "Christ") on the shields of his soldiers. Allegedly, a voice in the vision announced, By this sign you shall conquer."  Constantine went with his vision and winning the battle, a new religion was born.
The "magic" apparently worked, and so Constantine and his administration dedicated themselves or at least his new empire he would build to this "Christian god",,  unlike anything the Christ or the early Christians taught or lived.
This was the FIRST TIME anyone associated the Christ with violence, but it's success stained the followers from then on and became the Christian Church.

Constantine "legalized" Christianity in AD 313, this new Christian religion of violence and force.
Because of it's association with him, the religion immediately exploded in popularity. Of course it would, it was the same as the ways of this world. Within Seventy years it was proclaimed the official religion of the Roman Empire - making it a crime not to be a "Christian (the Jews were exempt from the law, but not from growing Antisemitism of the "church,"    The first recorded Christians murdering those they then called pagans, those that did not obey the law and attrition to their beliefs and doctrines, shortly after that.
In short order, the MILITANT CHURCH extended it's power by conquering lands and peoples throughout Europe, compelling them to be baptized Christians or DIE.  As Charlemagne instructed his "Christian troops" in their conquest of the Saxons: If there is anyone of the Saxon people lurking among them unbaptized, and if he scorns to come to baptism.... and stay a pagan, let him die!!"

The peace, love and just equality kingdom centered on mercy and compassion and the willingness to lay down one's life for another now had succeeded in becoming  a massive "POWERING OVER" kingdom centered on "the sword."  The church became "the church MILITANT AND TRIUMPHANT" and the kingdom of Divine Love (God) manifested in the crucified Nazarene, had become the EMPIRE OF CHRISTENDOM.

The unconditional love and humility that characterized the Christ, and the early followers of "The Way" had to be reininterpreted at this time to accommodate the new power that church "authorities" ie; leaders, a new archy not existent before among the early followers of the Christ, that church leaders believed "GAWD"  (I say that like a fundamentalist southern preacher would, punningly) had given to them, the "Church."
Instead of being seen as the essence of the kingdom of Divine Love, the" power under" lifestyle of Jesus and that which the early followers did it came to be understood as only a provisional inconvenience that had to be tolerated until this "(new religion) Christianity could gain the status, arky in the world..
Jesus had taught his early followers, the disciples to be humble and in that to be willing to suffer the world's judgment of their way of life, it was argued by these new zealots of the religion of Christianity, because they didn't have "THE POWER" to do otherwise.. But now they did!!
Forgetting that the "god of this age" all the authority of the kingdoms of this world and gives that power to whomever it wills..(Luke 4:6-8)  The grand delusion of Domination and Dominators, was now the recipe of the day for this new Religion, called Christianity, at it's height in "power over" nations and peoples at this time..

These Church leaders, hier-arky, of this time insisted that GAWD had given the Church the POWER OF THE SWORD and thus concluded "the church" had an obligation to use it.
Indeed, since the church knows the truth and the knows what is best for people, the thinking generally went, it would be positively immoral to lay this power aside and "come under" the "heathen."
Rather for the sake and for the glory of GAWD, the Church must use it's newfound "POWER OVER" to COMPEL, by "FORCE",  and heretics to agree with it and "be saved."
Why else would GAWD have given the power to us, they thought?

What followed was a long and terrible history of people using the sword "in Jesus' name for the glory of God,"   Though there are, of course, some examples of people that did not turn away from the Way, within the movements within "church history", the reigning church as a whole - "Christendom"- acted about as horrible as most versions of the kingdom of the world,  The Holy Roman Empire was about as violent as the Roman Empire it  aspired to replace.  It just carried out it's typical kingdom-of-the-world BARBARISM under a different banner and in service to a different god.

Augustine was the first theologian to align the church in an official way with the use of the sword, and happened to be a against a fellow "Christian" group, the Donatists. Among other things, the Donatists believed that the alliance between church  (religious arky ) and the state (political arky)...that had been forged since Constantine was undermining the purity and integrity of the church, and they wanted to keep the church pure.  Though Augustine had previously spoken against the "coercion" for religious purposes, his ongoing battle with the Donatists led him to reverse his view..

Augustine now justified the "use of force" by arguing that inflicting temporal pain to help someone avoid "eternal pain" is justified..
Since GAWD (God) had given "the church" THE POWER OF THE SWORD, Augustine reasoned, it has a responsibility to use it further God's purposes in the world just as a stern father has a responsibility TO BEAT HIS CHILDREN for his own good..
(ugh)...He reasoned that God sometimes uses terror for the good of humans, the we who are representatives of God on earth - the church- may use terror for the sake of the gospel.
If the end justifies it, the use of violence as a means to that end is justified."
This is, in essence, Augustine's "just war" policy,) Augustine thus invoked a recent edict of the emperor Theodosius to "Criminalize"  the "heresy" of Donatism and attempt to persecute it out of existence. This set a tragic PRECEDENT for handling doctrinal disagreements for the next THIRTEEN HUNDRED YEARS!!

Throughout the Middle Ages and into the Renaissance, millions were burned at the stake, hung, beheaded, or executed in other ways for resisting some aspect of - the church's- teaching or failing to exist ( operate) UNDER IT'S AUTHORITY..
Thousands upon thousands were totured in unthinkable ways in an attempt to elicit a "confession of faith" in the Savior and in the Church!! Some of the macabre torturing devices were often inscribed with the logo "GLORY BE ONLY TO GOD."
Christian ssectarian groups such as the Paulicans, Cathars, Albigenisians and Waldensians were massacred by the towns - often including women and children - and Christians in both the east and the west slaughtered each other "IN JESUS' NAME as ruthlessly as they slaughtered Muslims.
Terrible autrocities were carried out on Jews as well, expecially when the Crusades needed to be financed, and multitudes of women ( estimates range between sixty thousand to several million) were burned or hung for allegedly being witches - most of whom denied the charge. The followers of the once peaceful and love teaching Nazarene of THE WAY, who had once considered themselves resident aliens, had now  become the religion "Christianity"  a HORDE OF SAVAGE WARLORDS!!

Yes, the Church WAS and still is. the CHURCH MILITANT and TRIUMPHANT now still in bed with the Political State.. One of the same WHORE..

Now ask me why I am not a Christian, I think you should know why now..  ask me why I follow the Way, the Christ Spirit within me, as me.. and you should know the reason why now..

Ask me why I don't go to church am not a church member, ,, if you don't know why now.. you'll probably never understand..  but I hope you will..  sooner or later..

I did not have to throw out "The Way" to come to love, my fellow human race,  I actually awoke to the Peace and Love of the Way, of the Spirit of Christ IN ME, AS ME..   but I had to come out of her Babylon first..  and I do not support any kingdom of  THIS VIOLENT world,,, including the church in any way manner or form. AND NO I CANNOT RECONCILE JESUS AT ALL WITH CHRISTIANITY.... the two are so far apart.. it's unfathomable!!

I am a Spiritual Anarchist..  and that's who I am and how I intend to live..  like it or not..

- Joey Black


Be sure to follow my blog if you like, I will be writing more in the future here.. I hope this might be informative for many.. and might help some see even a glimmering of truth..

A Starting Story on Early Followers of "The Way."

Something that is hard to get "Christians" to understand is the facts are that for 363 years, the Followers of the Way of Peace and Love, had no canonized Scripture, though there had been various attempts and different ideas of the many letters, etc, that were being passed around among those who had heard of Jesus and or had the experience of knowing the Spirit of Christ within them for themselves. The other thing that is especially difficult to get modern day Christians to understand is how the church became an empire in complete contradiction of what the earlier followers of Christ, practiced as part of their own lives. For 250 years the early "Christians" were horribly persecuted by the Roman "Authorities, not so much for "religious reasons" as for POLITICAL ONES... The Romans tended to be tolerant of religions and incorporated local gods of conquered areas into the Roman pantheon. BUT Christianity was different. Christians DID NOT give their primary or any allegiance to the Roman Emperor, nor it's rulers and laws. and so Rome viewed Christianity as a threat to it's society, a society that was disintegrating anyway. A Christian refused to bow before STATISM. Like Jesus they lived, and were guided only by the Spirit of Life within them, and sought no rulers to rule over them. They had but one ruler in their lives, and that was the Spirit of Divine Love, the Christ within them. Yes, they were ANARCHIST, in the truest sense of the word. Spiritual Anarchist. Before Constantine's church, you would have not found a follower of the way, choosing to be a soldier, a police officer or any government official at all. They absolutely refused to call Caesar god or god like. How far Christianity drifted from there, is not hard to see or realize. Christians today are very ignorant of both, the history of the early followers before Constantine and the entire history of how, when and where their present Bible came to be. Most Christians don't even realize there is not one signature (original) scripture that exist today, anywhere in the world. There are more copies and fragments of many manuscripts more then any writing known in existence, but there are lot more then just the letters, books, and writings found only in the Canonized Scriptures determined by Constantine's Empire Church. That some alleged 'authorities" chose and rejected the others. Yet, even when chosen, these writings belonged exclusively only to the Empire Church, ie; "THE AUTHORITY", and to be interpreted by the "authorities" of the church ONLY for a very long time, until people like Jerome, Tynsdale and others, wanted to take them out of the languages of Konia Greek, Hebrew, and Aramic (dead languages) and put them into language that not just the authorities or alleged scholarly authorities could read but that more people could read for themselves.. So before Constantine, how did people know anything about this Jesus or the Way.. it was truly oral story passed from one to another and by the witness of their Own Spirit within, as to what the many stories meant for them.. but one thing they all agreed on that brought their persecution and deaths by the thousands if not millions was, they were "anarchist" for sure. They knew of only one Archy, the Spiritual Self, the Christ within, the Holy Spirit, God as their lives.. One Spirit.. one Life.. Any person that has come to that conclusion would never choose to give up his own sovereignty as a human being to be powered over by another human being, to be ruled over, but he would and could choose to use his will, his sovereignty for the benefit of another to lift them up to where they are, equals and that could mean and often did their very own physical death by murder by the State... especially to stand in the way of injustices done to another. To stand in the way of hate being poured out on others, to stand in the way of violence for the sake of peace.. Yes, one awakened cannot become anything less then a Spiritual Anarchist.. and yes it is political.. political in that it is the total anti-thesis of all the politics of this world.. Divine Love is, you know.. different.. very different then the conditional love, violence, retributive ways and judgments of this world.. - j.w. black 2016

Autonomy and Sovereignty is Spiritual

Autonomy and Sovereignty is Spiritual

I have watched with amazement and curiosity in how the public would react to all the revelation concerning what Americans think that  their freedom is all tied up in voting or being able to choose their rulers, finally being exposed for what it has been for most of the history of this nation, the "big fix."  and not just this nation but the entire history of this world.. written history that is..
This doesn't exclude that the exact same goes on in other nations and other times, it is clear if one has taken the time, to even study a bit of history they would have discovered this for themselves....
. It's the nature of the beast of rulers, in once gaining power, to do everything they can to obtain perfect power over the masses and keep it. Power is the beast.. it sucks anyone in at anytime, that doesn't recognize it for what it is..A Black Hole..  it will eat you alive, consume all that you are, once given over to..  Like a great Dragon, its fire will consume you.. leaving not much of what even looks human anymore.

I have watched as truth has been exposed, the masses just ignore it, as usual it seems. I use to have great hope that people with being exposed to truth, would see things more clearly. To be honest, I have lost a lot of that hope and even dream as some immediate over all effect that would take place all at once.. . It is clear it takes something more then even logical truth or proof of truth for a group,a  crowd or the individual to have a change of mind.

I know in my own experience, it wasn't just an over night thing, but an every day by day, being exposed to it all and life giving me more questions then I had the answers,  until one day, the big wham.  Why people fear that is crazy to me at least now.  But I like you back not so many years ago then feared as well.

Once awakened, yes it does turn upside down everything you once believed. But what did you really believe that didn't have you chained up in your minds and bodies?  What did you really believe that didn't have you fearful and anxious in so many ways? What kind of life do you really have, when you yourself ask yourself what is there to life almost everyday. You ask is this all there is just going to work, paying some bills, getting some sleep and doing it all over again, day after day and year after year until one day.. boom you die!!

Yes, there comes those once in awhile and on occasion given and found opportunities to get away from it all, Most folks will put themselves in debt even more to their slavery to obtain money they think is for a vacation, a time to relax, to be free from the daily routines, to only find themselves with thoughts that keep drifting toward, the end of that vacation and how hard they are going to have to work to pay for it all in the months to come. They never really discover that real peace within themselves, they can have without a vacation, without having to earn money at labor to some human masters, if not to the money itself.
Peace of mind, it is fleeting but for maybe those few weeks, when they aren't dragging themselves out of bed, to do what they have been told they must do in life.. Sacrificing what they think is their life to making the dollar bill, so that they may eat and have shelter and clothes.
I won't waste my time going there, on how much is really needed versus how much we think we need. Anyway my point wasn't to talk about the slavery of working for the masters or the paper symbol in our pockets...

My point is, very few people chance stepping out of that box and leaving it all to homestead or to do whatever to limit the controls being exercised over their lives by others. It appears to be just too much work to them, to have nature provide it's resources, with food more then plenty, housing made from the resources on one's land and energy provided from nature and natural physics and clothing to stay warm in the winters or cool in the summers that is available all around us everyday, that in our travel to the office or work, we totally ignore.
The Native Americans understood clearly what Mother nature had provided and for them it was more then enough.
They thought of the Great Spirit as benevolent to ALL LIFE.  and ALL LIFE BENEVOLENT.

Ask yourself, why is it humans fear autonomous life and living, meaning being their own guides in utilizing their internal natural desire to care for themselves and others equally the same. Is it that we have been for so long by both business, economics, politics and especially religion, taught to not trust ourselves. We have actually come to believe our basic nature is horrible and disgusting and evil..

Yet, how is it the very trust we won't give to ourselves or all other human beings as One, we seem to find it easy to mistrust ourselves and our neighbors individual sovereignty and ability to make good choices, moral choices of love and our own ability as well. How is it we think we can't accomplish anything for the good of all the group "humanity" without someone powering over us, telling us what we must do and how? How is it that we think we are the only one's that should be doing that over others, often as well.
Placing people in power, most that think in voting they are going to get an individual that thinks exactly like they do, and will act like they want them to do. How is that even possible considering the thousands of variables that accumalated together giving us our likes and dislikes in life and how easy we are influenced by the crowd? Yes, humans need companionship and relationship, but one needs sovereignty most of all. Why, because they will ever fail to come to know who they really are without the influence of another individual and especially the group.
There's probably much can be said about the good part of stepping away from it all and even being an ascetic for a time.  The quiet, the solitude alone, the time to just yourself to come to know yourself honestly is worth more then it's weight in gold.  Much more can be said about accepting yourself as well for all that you are, the good, the bad and the ugly if based on the judgments of good and evil, which never seem to remain a constant among society, culture and ruling men.  These things change from generation to generation and yes from group to group..

I ask one thing, is force and violence ever really good for anyone?  Well, it does appear most people think it is just fine until it is utilized against themselves.. whether it be by a power they once thought as good or one they thought was evil...
I had a friend who use to think I was crazy when I spoke about some of these things,. especially regarding our criminal justice (injustice , punishment) system as being not just, not loving and definitely not correct or right most of the time, just because they say they are,. or we have previously thought and believed they are..  He would fight vigorously with me over my view versus his status quo view.. until the injustice landed him in jail..   and he suffered at the hands of it.  He apologized after ward and told me I am sorry you were right..
What changed his mind? Was it his own belief he shouldn' t suffer at their hands, that he was righteous and they were doing him wrong, or what?  That the system had lied, committed acts and perjury even to crucify him?
Well, yes that was part of it.. So, he came out of determined to try to not let those things happen again.. to anyone else. But as usual, he chose the very route of powering over others thinking he could accomplish that.. within the system and became a lawyer..  funny thing is he found himself  serve on the very same side of those who had harmed him.. what made him make that move from truth to error once again..   MONEY... it is plain and simple.. He had become accustomed to living a certain lifestyle and thought he could start a private practice right out of law school and go to working to helping what he thought would be people's innocence in courts of law.. The problem is, that side of the law doesn't start out all financially booming, and matter of fact most public defense attorneys  earn almost nothing if they were to rely on funds from that, they would starve. So, most will have to advertise and first build up an reputation for doing defense for those that have the money.  Drug dealers, politicians, the ultra and mid wealthy,etc.. they can pay.. but the poor white guy, the black man, the hispanic, any minority that isn't already into a lot of money they will never see a real defense. there hope is over, the minute they are accused. I can't tell you how many pro-bono investigations  I took on for the disadvantaged but I too could not have made a living from that alone. so I had to do a whole lot of other things to make it in the business of Private Investigations.

The entire system of Capitalism and any other government form is not designed for the benefit to help or assist the down trodden but to enrich and empower those who will seek to do the same, "to power over others", rather then serve their fellow humans in love.  In 63 years of living, desiring nothing more but to  live by my heart and be compassionate and merciful in this life, it became virtually impossible because it was all being done within and with the very system of this world that is so against the all. and serves only the few..
I found it in business the same, I found it in the church ( religion) the same. Every where I turned, the more you desired to be loving, compassionate, merciful and caring of others, you were cast down and cast out or you had to make the decision to give up your heart, shut off any compassion or thought of your own and go with the crowd, serving only their masters as slaves never for the overall good of ALL of us.. but only for the few, at the top.. which in turn did serve your dependency on them for they would give you some reward for your loyalty to their systems of this world.. like a doggie who does the trick the master commands, he gets his doggie bone..

In 2012, after I really woke up, I absolutely could no longer, play the game of the world systems no longer.. I saw and knew what they were for a very long time.. but I had always in just that corner of my mind, been fearful of stepping out completely alone and being called, heretic, devil, oddball, crazy etc.. We don't admit that to ourselves. but truth is.. we are afraid to stand outside of the crowd, because it is as obvious those that do, become the new scapegoat and sacrifice for the maddening insane crowd..(who consider themselves the "normal ones",  they want blood, violence, force done on another, anything that will pay they think for their own sins, not considering it's their own problem, their own to deal with, not to be put upon other human flesh.  and should not be put upon someone else., those things that they need to deal with in their own lives.  In Spiritual Awakening comes a great sense of not just personal responsibility, or knowing yourself completely but actually being able to do something about it, yourself. and all your own, honesty of self,. without others judgments, others commands, without the need of others exercising their will over your own. and especially without having to dump all your on angst onto others, to make them pay for your being human as well.   Without the need to use force or violence and exercising your own will over others, most importantly, one becomes free of all that..

There is a very real adversary in this world.  people, it's not a human, or group or humans, or even one to two individuals.  that adversary is that ideology and belief I bought into and others do everyday..  that in order to live in this earth, one must power over other humans, that to survive one cannot serve in love others and treat others equally as one self.  it's all about us, it's in the very systems of business, religion, politics, and so many forms.. that many people yet see. .
It's not the same as making a sacrifice, as I as one disagree with that is what Jesus was all about as Christianities predominant doctrines have taught. but , True love for others and self is not a sacrifice of one's self, it's actually the gaining and finding of one' self all over again..
Now can it be a sacrifice as far as others see it, yes because in their view to give up something they don't want to give up is sacrificial.
But to love and have mercy and compassion for other humans that flows from one's heart. is not something that you don't want to have but must.  That kind of love is not love at all. but forced, violent tyrannical but never love..
What flows from the truth of the heart is no effort at all, love, real love when discovered, will cost you nothing, if you really know who you are, it flows, because you find you can't really be any longer what you once were, because you know now, that was all a lie..a deceit, a delusion merely a cloned mask of the group you once wore..  .. but yes will it cost you your standing, in the group, of those who don't understand.. probably very much so..  and along with that does often come, denial of things needed in this life from their hands, from their help, from their care, because they never really had any in the first place..  it was all motivated out of ego and self aggrandizement to achieve a means of powering over you..  they are the first to leave your side, once you awake.  They no longer understand you, and why you do what you do or what you think..   truthfully they don't understand you at all.  Most of them think you have gone nuts, to stand out of the crowd like you do, alone without fear at all.  For them to even consider such a step out of the box, scares them to death... the looming threat, if not conscious, rules their subconscious that it might mean the very end of them.. what they don't know yet is it would mean the very beginning of them..  who they are.. really are.. and they would be liberated, mind, body, soul and spirit. . Our bodies are the temple of the Spirit, and as long as our minds, emotions, and body are held in captive to the ways of this world, in its violence, force, exercising powering over others, ego living. Our Spirits are quenched from living out of liberty and love, and compassion..  our true selves..
 We never needed a new capsule containing the Spirit, what we always needed was to realize the capsule, this body, our emotions, our soul, our mind are not the gods over us, but there to serve as part to who we really are.  SPIRIT.. Divine love.. expressed..
The mind is a gateway, but only a gateway, the entire body must first die to that which it has come to believe it is.. GOD over you and your true heart. it is not..  This does not mean we lose who we are, to die to (false)  self.  But that we gain who we really are ( true)  self..

True self will never need some other human to tell it what to do, or how to do it..  for you see, true self was always God.. One Life, One Spirit, One Mind, One Soul, One Body, ....ONE... and no matter how difficult this is for others comprehension..  God does not love, God does not even choose to love,,,,,,...  GOD IS LOVE..   God is limited to what it is.
God is not a something that does, but God is the something that is..   DIVINE UNCONDITIONAL PURE UNADULTERATED PERFECT LOVE......  the love you truly are.. and will discover, when you awake from the sleep you have been under..  at not fault of your own, except, when you first gave your own sovereign being of choice over to another 's choice and let them rule you.. and that we have all done. unintentionally, but it just happened as we come into this world with fully grown hearts but a mind, body, emotions, and soul that evolves..  Love  (Divine, Holy Spirit) was there in the beginning fully matured and enabled, and perfect, pure, and divine.. but how would we know, unless we find that out for ourselves. within ourselves, as DESIGNED... .
Thus all those that try to rule over you, stunt your growth, needed for the Spirit to break loose from this shell of what we perceive to be merely material form to be released and seen as the Spiritual Body we truly are IN THE  here and now..

Jesus did not tell Martha he must first be resurrected  as in the last day, as so many think  and all religions have taught. He said I AM the Resurrection and the Life..  and so are we..   but unless a seed be put in the ground it cannot grow. I am not talking about the ego self in the sense as if you must be dead physically first. and put in the ground... for then you wouldn't be a self acknowledged identity, going by your name.. It's talking about many of the things I have written right here.. but that's for you to find out, on your own..
for though I have spoken, my words are meaningless to those, that have not undergone the Cacoon Chrysalis Stage yet and flown free as a butterfly.

 When you do, you will know exactly what I am talking about.. !!! I promise..

When will that be.? . I cannot say.. no more then I could say, "the day and hour" when it happened to me!!

So I don't really expect everyone to see why government is so wrong for you, yet, I only can share in hopes you will begin to see..... possibilities beyond.. the box, the matrix.. we think we are entrapped in,, or even think.. this is all there is..    There's much much more.. .but one cannot know until they desire beyond all things.. their liberty..  from whatever bondage it is,  that holds you now in slavery..

The Inteus Editorial

If you are one of my Facebook friends, you will recognize "Inteus" as my chosen nickname for my profile. It is simply a Native American name meaning, "No Shame."

For nearly five years, I have posted on Facebook, everything from my family, to what I do, where I have been and my thoughts and opinions. I want to eliminate my thoughts and opinions on Facebook and keep it simple for now on, with less information there.

Generally Facebook individuals, don't care to read much beyond anything more then a paragraph. My post often exceed that and are more like a Facebook Note.. Thus, one of the many reasons I am returning to writing and publishing a blog is to be able to express my thoughts and opinions on various subjects here, and with a bit of more freedom, then there.
Furthermore it's difficult to put them in a single paragraph as the post, and at times, I utilize quite a bit of comment space, for a continuation of the post. This should be the end of that!!

I have published several blogs before, but only one that went on for a few years. It was originally called the "Athens Independent News."
 Most of those posted articles are now archived in Google Blogger, under the title of Joe Black blogs..

My intended purpose here is to write each day or every other day, my thoughts particularly on the subject of individual sovereignty, the Spirit of the individual, and our Oneness as humanity.
It is not my purpose to convert individuals but simply to offer opinions that might inspire others to think for themselves and to consider perhaps viewpoints a bit out of the box of their already conformed thinking.
I say conformed thinking because we have been since an early age, been taught to see, perceive and evaluate things in only a certain way. We fear to have a change of mind about much of anything that we believe and have believed for a very long time. We especially fear thinking outside of the status quo, as we fear being or made to feel as an outcast out of the greater group of humans around us everyday, our family, our friends, and in general our culture and society altogether. We also fear more then anything, that we could possibly be wrong or have been wrong in what we have believed..
It leaves us with a very scary feeling, our psyches are anchored in our beliefs..

To have a new paradigm view is threatening to our ego. It has to be exposed, made completely naked all over again, and willing to take in new information perhaps that in former belief, we have told our self it was wrong, error or incorrect, yet without ever examining those very same beliefs ourselves for possible truth.

I hope at the end of my blogs, people will feel free to comment, in a positive note, as to if what I have written, may have pricked just a bit of that wanting to be courageous and possibly think about things in a new way, then ever before..  to at least have taken from what I have written with them, perhaps something new, that might be possible and turning it over in their own minds.
To be inspired to themselves to be bold and courageous and step outside of the box even if for but a moment.. and toss it around in their head and in their hearts.. and just see, if my opinion might have some validation within their own logic and experiences.

Anyway, I hope you will read my blog and follow it, even if you never ever comment, but it would be nice now and then to let me know that you do.. at least I will know if I should even continue writing one or not..  liked or not liked.. if you read it, at least I will know the effort made by me, to express my thoughts and opinions have some value to you. They always have value to me, if but anything as self therapeutic.

May love and peace be with you always,

Joey Black  aka " INTEUS"